Hey Guys, It’s Ricky and Julian and Bubbles Talking about THe Band - Frig OFf Mr Lahey, Man.
Corey. Trevor. Smokes. LETS GO. HURRY UP.
(Brady here: Oh my god it hurts my brain to type in Trailer-Park Boys RP/tone. Anyway, a lot of this is very nonsensical ‘cause in-character… scroll down to Julian’s spiel further down if your brain hurts.)
Hey thanks Brady man. Go have a good nap, bud.
Here’s a Youtube Link, guys. I’ve gotta go free Corey and Trevor from the Berb Gesserit, there’s a Shai Hulud and the idiots are using the damn thumper to try and keep them away. Those boys are fucked. Anyway, Bubbles is g onna start then Ricky, then me okay?
Hey, you guys want some spice-melange?
Hey Guys! Bubbles Here. Teedle-Eedle-ee! Who’s Got Your Belly…?
I brought along Butters…. Brady’s kitty…big 8 year old… real nice guy but he won’t let me have him. He’s got a whole…. fuckin’ ‘ADHD’ concentration mess so he said we could write about the band… Pretty nervous to tell ya the fuckin’ truth… I get why he wants to keep the kitty he’s a nice guy.
Weird thing is guys, they got all these weird names. Chicken Man, Mr. Chicken Man… sounds too fuckin’ hard to keep track of it aboot the place but i guess way she goes.
Ricky:Isn’t his name like Branden, or Brody…. Brady-Brunch is a made show Bubbles. From the Soviet Nukulear Times in the Colden Wars. Dumbass.
(Bubbles: RICKY! SHUT THE FRIG UP!)
Aww, look at the kitty Rick. He’s a nice guy… never scratches…. always loves getting fuckin picked up and carried and the house, you can even teedle-eedle-eedle his belly… no claws mostly…
But oh man. He meows too much! Like Brady’s always talkin’, writing… too much. But Butters is next level. Meow meow, meow, meow friggin MEOW. Nice litttle guy… might make some Side B ambient tracks about him… big fuckin’ tail… teef…. hehe
Ricky: Hey guys, Credit Nationals to the phone user from the Rednet site. The one with all those creepy intercel guys that wear those detective hats, and post big brain learnin’s so they can look hot for Amsterdamstralien chicks where Broyden’s from…. dont know why… it’s a big drive oot down the road (RICKY!) fuck. Sorry Bubbles,Jesus. Anyway user number off the pepperoni link is across here on the words that are emboldened, thanks to /u/Thralls Balls. (Bubbles what’s with the fucking funny u and the sideways arms on the name, is that like Puerto Rican language that the Australians Speak (RICKY!)
Bubbles again.,,,, sorry guys. That’s off /r/TrailerParkBoys. And it’s NOT Rednet Ricky, you dumbass. It’s Reddit. And theyre incels.
He fuckin’ lives in AUSTRALIA not Amsterdam.
No Ricky, I don’t know if the dope’s the same. FRIG OFF!
Sorry guys..
If you ask me…. fuckin’ no idea what the 4chan and the /b/ and /r/, just speak plain words—- everybody sounds FUCKED if they talk like THAT. Like, imagine if you had to friggin’ say fuckin’ slash well fuckin woah-wee, before your name… on forms… sound like a goddamn Sorcerer from Dungeons and Dragons with a big smert mouth.
FRIG OFF RICKY!
Ricky keeps asking about the leans in closer, eyes darting feverishly naughty pictures websites and I said, Ricky, frig off and have some dope and chill oot. Hopefully he’s not feedin’ the geese in front a’ that poor kitty.
Anyways bud.
So…. I’m nervous, right..
Brady (NOT Broyden, or fuckin…. Bradyen, fuck). He got real shy and nervous, the ADHD thing, brain starts racin’ and if you ask me, that doesn’t sound like a mental disease?! Everyone in Sunnyvale Trailer Park’s like that. Even the folks further down the other towns down in Nova Scotia… all fast talking, lots of words, forgetting things…
maybe he’s (leans closer, whispers) Canadian. [wry chuckle]
“RICKY! STOP EMBEDDING LINKS! THEY GET IT, YOU’RE CANADIAN. BY THE GOLDEN PATH.”
“There’s some REAL GREASY BASTARDS from Czechslovakia called Gutalax, they make these songs, real short ANGRY songs about poop and farts... toilet and shit. Real Greasy. Guy even sounds like a piggy, it’s wild guys... Brady reckons it’s autism which is why he likes it... I think he’s angry and FUCKED (in a nice way) if you ask me... real crazy guys.... nutcase fucked in the head music folks. GREASY.”
Anyways, the poor guy with an inferiority complex… he’s trying to get a submission in to play a support show.
He’s gonna fuckin’ do the whole one-man thing.
I respect that of course… pretty hard so he’s shaking…
By the way, Brady said it’s kinda, well, payment for me to drop my link to mysong here.. real fancy, nothing greasy like the European guys that he wants to submit an email post-mail message to ask about maybe playing… I don’t know how to do that. But I know how to write a good song, boys and girls and people.
He was all like, (in that funny Australian voice), ‘
“Just tell them hey guys, really don’t want to be one of those ‘greasy’ content-creators that beg for likes. But hey, if I’m doing it, straight-up, I’ll just do it once.”
… whatever that means… can’t imagine sittin’ in front of a FUCKIN’ laptop asking to be liked… 3 billion people doing it on Facebook… must be something to it right..
Hey Google, how do i get Bard AI to fuck off…. it’s not DND night…
oh sorry… guys..
But he said like, fuck, no one under the age of 600 really uses Facebook 100% of their own volition, it’s a ‘walled-garden digital ecosystem… but it’s on there, the whole tour thing. I think that’s an exaggeration, i dunno though
… lotta OLD greasy people on Arrakis and in Nova Scotia too..
He asked me to share the poster… I didn’t FUCKIN know you could posters inside computers. I’m gonna make one for Bubbles Shed and Breakfast… get some accommodation money… no more fuckin’, Julisan Al Gaib and the fuckin’ Bene Gesserit, spice-trading, dope-smuggling, stealing TV’s..
HERE is the big online poster for the shit-grind band he wants to ‘take a stab at a support slot via email’… guys i dunno, is that slang? sounds GREASY.. you don’t have guns right? I hate guns.
That’s the REAL, OFFICIAL GUTALAX WEB PAGE GUYS…. no fuckin’… curly haired fuckin’ albino Mark Smuckenberg, That guy’s GREASY.
Go check em ‘oot. Julian and Ricky are doin’ Side A… his grindcore side… Ricky’s gonna explain that with Julian
Oh yeah, fuck sorry bud. Poster. No Mark’s greasy fingerprints on it or nothin bud.
BRADY LET ME MAKE HIM COUPLE OF NEW POSTERS…. USED Canva. Tell you what bud, feelin’ pretty big ‘brain-learning’ like that idiot Ricky calls ‘er. He’s FUCKED.
Gave me the words… jeez guys, for a guy who can say big words he does some dumb stuff…
He went on some half-hour rant about social media being ‘a zero-sum game’… kept ranting, ranting ranting… Anyways, on Facebook you’re FUCKED and don’t have a name for your handle… I don’t see any fuckin’ door handles on the link.
MARK FUCKI'N’ SQUAWKERBERG made it so if you don’t have a profile, you can’t in… GREASY.
Then there’s the ISC Playlist on Youtube, which is where he said he ‘stores’ the songs.
I don’t see a fuckin’ barn, it’s all frigged in the head.
He’s got LOTS of songs on there, one of the writers plays drums, really cool band from Melbourne, SLIKNITA… check em oot..
says maybe there’ll be drums on here maybe in future from that guy Hamza… DECENT writer.… and Brady’s doing some… fancy..fixin’ up some of the FUCKED sounding covers off his phone… ‘DAW’s… Reaper… DI…. computer stuff…. Brady’s phone not Hamza’s…
Anyways. I put the intro song on up there in the cool TV unit video part for Youtube. lots of screamin’ …hollering. But this one’s just like an intro… got some clips from when we did the show at the Perk. Much nicer… bit too crazy.
Here’s Ricky, my hands are hurtin… bye guys… Butters say bye..
“Ricky: ‘Hey guys, I was lookin’ up how to get my grade 10 and I found this real smart guy on FacedBook. Or her I dunno, like person. Justin Trombone, the guy that just got executed from Perlerment was all like ‘dont look at people and think there a gander, cause people’s gander’s like inside them. So like, don’t take a gander the wrong way and be respectful of folks, don’t be a dick like Scott in South Perk or fuckin’... god fuckin’ Cyrus man.
Anyways, there’s some smart email electronic FaceTok page, it’s called Getting Learnt Philosophy, im like cool with them sharing my learnin’s.... wouldn’t even afford a lawyer since Sam fucked off with all my dope and smokes.
Hey you guys seen Corey and Trevor?’”
Julian: Rick. You just copied and pasted from the Facebook Cover Photo. Not the written blurb.
Jesus Christ, man.
ey guys its rick-
Hey sorry guys.
SO yea.
I grew smokin lot’s of dope from Grade 2, Dad I love Metallica. Brandon Samberg the Danish Australian bloggen guy what owns this said post up a meme… I had no idea what that’s aboot.
Spent like 8 hours on Goon-gle. Got real smart from Wikerpedia and Yourtube, made some learning and thiking bout how what not make a meme on here. Sorry about Mr Lahey. It’s funny but he’s such… frig off.
sorry bud, i cant do peperonci links… makes my brain too wrinkled up and my thoguhts get bad. Brady says thats why he took a break, too many linking pepperoni on here.
I think BRadley Milton said make a sauce for the pepperonci links… but like this one was some fucked number on the mail post site, 4004. I was like FUCK OFF.
sorry guys, im jet flagged but i had some Byron Bay hash and it was like really weak but it put my neuron cells and made the pieces glue back so i can focus what good.
I wrote my last thing, im kinda tired… Dad needs smokes and I dunno, kinda worried about whether Berb Gesserit are gonna crys-knife us, bottle kids assassinate us… Julian might be eaten by the Snail Hooded…
HERE is it.
'Guys.... that guy down in Geetroit, Melborn, that place with all the coffees that have all those fuckin' Vanilla Iced Lattes and the Gramfitti on the streets, he lives in one o those.
Anyways he's like... hes not like me, pretty fuckin' dumb to be thinkin clearly like i did, but he said like, he's gonna post a big interdiction to interdict all of us to you guys on blognonaise. The writing place that doesnt disappear into the ads like Facingbook.
Like when you meet someone and youre like hey, you guys got any smokes? on inter-gram check, here's the chain - link ... Inner-Strength Check Podcast
Anyway, one of us will press the Mail Post blue button think. Fuck man, I need to lie down, all this Facenook's got my thoughts like floating around outta the compartments.
here's some like promotion emails .... words and stuff, coupla big ones on there bud,'
Hey, Bubbles forgot to put the second picture in [laughs], maybe hes got that Australian… Department of Human Services Disorder haha
oh hey Julian’s back guys and girls and…. people what have all the different human spectrum colours cause like, only inkcels talk like there’s two genders, the binary code system… that’s like really dumb and people should be trans-gander any choice they want or what goes on in there body… just fuckin’ body parts chill oot.
okay bye
- Ricky
Ornithopter whirring in distance
MFW when it’s Julisan-al-Gaib, Muad-Dib! Muad-Dib!
‘RICK! How stupid are you bud? He said NO Chat GPT! No, THAT’s Google. GOOGLE.COM. NOT FUCKING GORGON.
Oh my god guys. Sorry man. Brady was like ‘specifically, no DALL-E, RICK, anyways Rick didn’t even put the right fuckin’ NAME into the prompt. That’s meant to be me man. Oh god guys, that’s so fake. Is that AI?! That sucks dude.
Anyway, since these two idiots didn’t write ANYTHING DOWN, I’ll get my script oot. One sec guys.
Hey everyone. Juli-san Al’ Gaib/Muad’ Dib here. Hey bud, sorry man. I’m back.
“[clears throat] ‘Hey guys, Julian here.’
’Hey sorry guys. Been real busy with the whole Golden Path thing. Friggin’ Berb’s such a dick man. Not only is she not renewin’ the fuckin’ lease, now she’s got all these freakin’ girls from prison holed up in the Sooth, oot that way aboot. And now that Brady guy. Oh my GOD man. I thought Aussies were meant to be chilled-oot, he’s like freakin’ oot about these posts and Ricky keeps trying to get him drunk and I’m like leave him alone, Rick! Fuck.’
’Anyways, I sent Corey and Trevor with the Fremen oot to try and sniff out the Barbara Gesserit. Spreading some bullshit about how I’m not the rightful heir to the Atreides throne, can you guys believe that shit?’
’Anyways. We were in the middle of trying to break into the Spacer Guild and yknow, borrow some spice essence and a Sand Troot or two, just like, yknow, 15,000 years or so for my sons who aren’t born yet. It’s wild shit man, you like, trip oot and see all kinds of jobs you can do around the perrrk for like 15,000 years into the future.’
’Some smarty-pants guy, probably an American or like, a hipster from Toronto, posted this. And I was like BUD WHAT! DIDN’t I JUST post aboot a Dune song?’
’Anyways, that Sam Altman guy, I’m planning on calling him, maybe breaking into his truck and borrowing like... 40,000 NVidia GPUs so we can make some good crypto cash, dump the merkert like that Hawk Tuah chick.’
’Yeah look guys, I’m pretty high and like. Bud I just, I’m sitting on the dunes, thumper goin’, chillin oot, and i see this fuckin’ post on that incel 4chan copycat thing Reddit, and im like ‘dude i can’t steal that, I’m sending OP a message.’
’Anyways long story fuckin’ long bud... way she goes. Maybe if OP gets back to me I can ask him about like if he’s got melange, what do you guys reckon? TV crew? Guys?’”
Oh fuck. That wasn’t meant to be the Quote. Wrong button.
Brady gave me something LEGIBLE [staring at the others] to read oot. But like it’s too Australian, so I crossed a bit oot and put it in Canadian English cause, man, have you heard Australians talk?
“RICKY! DID YOU WRITE OVER MY SCRIPT?”
FOML (Frig Off, Mr. Lahey!) is a Trailer Park Boys-themed extreme metal project. Way she fuckin' goes, bud. If you'd still like to be friends with benedicts, I'm an optometrist not a pessimist, so let's hear what this silly one-man project entails:
Influenced by artists ranging from Discordance Axis, Strapping Young Lad and EXPANDER to Aphex Twin, Siberian Hell Sounds and Fire-Toolz, FOML's upcoming material will be in two distinct parts:
Side A:
Grade Ten Rocket Appliances - The heavier stuff. Noisy, grindy, mayhem.
Side B:
Bubbles' Shed-N-Breakfast - More wistful ambience and less chaos. But only slightly.
Working demo title is 'Nova-Scotian Hunger'.
Gear:
* Warwick Corvette fretless bass + BP-355 Multi-FX.
(maybe guitar, but maybe also just layering hella distorted bass chords. We'll see).
* 1BITDRAGON - for the bleepy-bloop.
* Lots and lots of samples, effects, and noise.
Can't promise it'll be much worth more than something Ray's got gathering dust next to pee jugs, but stay tuned for some noisy madness.
hey guys its Rick, hey look man, how much of a crinkle-dince is it that we talk about Amtrakis and Dune and the Spy Who Should and then like Brady sent us this like right then.That’s like jusrisprudence and seredentity.
There’s the PAstebook name in the picture so If you want the pepperoni they’re on Z with Elmo Tusk. it’s got the pixellations from being on the sand on Arralis. So its like if you look hard with your brain you see it good.
‘Corey. Trevor, spice. Go. Listen, If I gotta go to war with the Heinekens, I gotta be high. I’m the Quiznos hat rack so what I say goes.’
ENTER SAMSQUANTCH CHECK PRODCAST BUTTONS:
“Hey, guys! High Five? Julian said it’s xecutable by death but i looked it up about capital punishment and like, dude capitals are cities, i think he’s getting it mixed up with the Europe poo band coming to Sydney. High FIVE? Dude? Dude? Yo dude h-”
